Patrina M Wright
What we see, feel and experience determine our relationships with other people. It also impacts our self-image, how we feel about ourselves. As we learn to love and value ourselves, we attract people who value who we are. When we don’t love ourselves, we will attract those who are unable to give us the love we deserve. Some of the reasons we have a problem loving ourselves can be traced back to unresolved issues of our past that caused emotional wounds.
Every little girls dream is to be called, “Princess” by her father. A father is the one who helps his daughter develop a healthy self-image. A father provides affirmation, acceptance and value.
They help us develop an awareness of being wanted, accepted, cared for, adored and loved. A father also teaches us how to relate to the opposite sex. However, when we don’t feel this sense of belonging there is an empty space created within our hearts.
These unmet emotional needs can create father wounds. These open wounds produce deep emotional pain. Oftentimes, to fulfill our needs we venture out early in life looking for love, sometimes we search in all the wrong places and find our hearts broken time and time again.
Another unresolved wound that causes women to attract relationships with the same kind of men is childhood sexual abuse. Many women have experienced sexual abuse, molestation, rape and incest by the hands of someone they should have been able to trust. As a result of shame, guilt, depression, fear and anxiety many victims suffer in silence. All too often we learn how to sweep issues under the rug and pray that the scars of the abuse will go away, with time.
Unfortunately, as time goes on the wounds become even more infected. Truth of the matter is covered wounds don’t heal. Time doesn’t heal wounds. Our inner brokenness makes us unable to discern what’s healthy and what’s not. Unresolved hurts damages our self-esteem and leaves us at-risk. We learn to tolerate mistreatment, cheaters and beaters just to have a man.
In order to be able to attract a man who is whole within himself we need to be whole. Therapy, counseling or coaching can help you work through these issues. When your life has been shattered by heartache, pain and suffering you lose something- yourself. When you don’t know who you are, you become somebody else only to end up hating who you have become.
The good new is, though we can’t go back and change our past we take charge of our future. We can be restored. We can rebuild. We recover what we have lost.
Biography of Rev. Patrina M Wright
Rev. Patrina Wright is a temperament counselor, author, motivational speaker, abuse prevention specialist and healing coach. She is the author of “Still Scarred, Totally Healed: Opening Your Heart and Mind to God’s Healing of Past Hurts” and “The Exodus Breaking Cycles and Changing Lives: Repositioning Your Soul To Thrive After Domestic Violence”. Rev. Wright is also the producer and host of a talk show called, Restore, Recover, Rebuild. Through her nonprofit organization she offers resources and training seminars to help pastors and other organizations effectively provide help, hope and healing to families dealing with abuse. She is also the founder of Beyond the Abuse Ministries, a healing ministry focused on helping people experience recovery and wholeness through conferences, retreats and personal coaching.
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